I realize it’s been a very long time, over five months, since I posted anything. I apologize, Littlest and his birth. I will attempt to do that, and I’m breaking this down into sections so that I don’t overwhelm you, or me, with biting off too much to share at a time. 🙂
I last blogged in March, and wow, a lot happened shortly after my last blog!
April, 2011 was pretty much the same as March, but with continuing weight loss on my part, even less ability to keep food down. Towards the end of April, more complications were popping up; my heart was arrhythmic, my blood counts were low, and I was suffering from severe dizziness and weakness. We moved the week of Easter, just to throw another tough situation into the mix. 😉 My parents came down to help us, and my Dr. put me on some heart-stablizing medications (which also helped bring my dizzy spells down). By the end of April, I was downright stir-crazy from bedrest, and starting to rebel a little and do more than I should have. (Which is actually how I found out that my heart wasn’t dealing with pregnancy so well, if I did any extra effort, my body quickly told me “no.”)
Enter May, and the expectation of “just two more weeks!” until baby came. Even with a scheduled Cesarean, I was keeping an eye out for signs of labor since I was at risk for pre-term labor. On May 11, I went in for a second visit to Triage (the first was because of severe low blood pressure and heart arrhythmia), because I was positive this was early labor. I was having contractions, achy, and just felt all around “impending.” They hooked me up to the monitors, and the only way they could keep an ear/eye on Littlest was if I was lying flat on my back. That was pretty effective in tightening my stomach completely, it was like one huge long contraction, and they told me that there was no “variations on the monitor that would denote contractions.” One nurse told me I had just a couple contractions, but they weren’t “strong” enough to cause concern, and after examining me, and determining I was at 1 cm. they sent me home, on complete bedrest and told me to come back at 7am in the morning for my 12 noon Cesarean.
That night, I laid low, had my bags packed, and went to bed at 8 pm. I slept really, really well, and woke up at 4 am, feeling just “icky” and decided at 4:30 that I might as well get up and shower, since I wasn’t anywhere near going back to sleep. While I was showering, my contractions hit me fast and hard, and I told my mom and Joel that we had to leave for the hospital right then. Joel and my mom were ready, and we left for the hospital, with my contractions hitting me really hard every couple of minutes. My mom said later that she was trying to think of the most sanitary piece of swaddling in the car, in case Mac decided to show up during the 10 minute drive.
Once I got to the hospital (around 5am), they quickly realized this was active labor, and they called Dr. Thomas. He happened to be in his office there, after a full night of deliveries at various hospitals (can you tell the Lord was at work here?). As they were prepping me for an emergency Cesarean, he asked me if I wanted to try for a spinal block, and I asked for general anesthesia. I knew that if I went for a spinal, Mac would end up being born and I knew that it was very risky for his health to be delivered naturally. As they were wheeling me to the OR and the anesthesiologist was having me sign the waivers stating I knew the risks of general, Dr. Thomas asked Joel if I “always went this fast” in labor. Joel smiled and said “Yes.”
Littlest was born at 5:32 am, 6lb. 5oz. and 18 inches long. He had bruises on his cheekbones, because he was being born when the Dr. pulled him out… but his back opening was clean and safe from infection. Praise the Lord! The opening measured 3cm. x 3cm., which sounds really small until you realize that was the part that was open to his spine, there was a little more area that was affected by the myelomeningocele, so when you looked at his back, it looked like his entire lower back was one gaping wound.
Because I was under general anesthesia, they cleaned up Mac separate from my recovery room, and I got to see him about 45 minutes after he was born once he was in his isolette and ready to be transported to Children’s Hospital. I was very groggy, but I remember vividly the agony of not being able to hold my baby in my arms, the pain of seeing all the wires, tubes, gauze and monitors on and around his little body, and the absolute mind-numbing anguish of them wheeling my minutes old baby away from me as I was stuck in a hospital bed without any clue as to when I would be able to be with him.
While the RN who was transporting him filled me in on protocol and procedures, I stroked his little (tiny! perfect! adorable!) foot and tried to pay attention to the discussion while my mind was being pulled back into grogginess by a little something called Morphine. The one time I indulged in the morphine pump was right after they wheeled Littlest away, I knew that it would help me sleep.
The next day (Friday), Dr. Thomas came by and told me that he had rarely seen someone go so fast in labor, and he filled me in on my surgery. Since I was already up and walking around (24 hours after surgery), he ok’d me being discharged that day, so long as I promised to take it easy and use my painkillers as needed. I was discharged around 1pm and was finally out of the hospital at 2:30 pm, with the single-focus of going and seeing my baby.
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